Check out this week’s episode of my Pokemon trivia and battle strategy show, The Dex! This week, we cover a classic, Bulbasaur, with special guest The Completionist!
Anonymous asked: I am literally in love with you because of how you were talking to sensation bot. I thought it was fucking hilarious.
Anonymous asked: hi
S U R P R I S E.
MYSTERY SEARCH CONTINUES.
Just what is it that makes a spy the fucking BEST? How does anyone even know who the best fucking spy is? Fuck spies.
William Colby was the head of the CIAntral Intelligence Agency for three years in the fucking seventies, but before that he had his fingers all over shit like Vietnam and Phoenix. If you’re imagining like, a really shrewd looking bastard with like, a really American face and just the most BORING FUCKING GLASSES, you’re right bitch. That’s William MOTHERFUCKING E. Colby. This dude was tops.
But guess what, KIDS? He was so the fucking tops that this dude finally told everybody about a bunch of really bad shit the government did. For some SHITTY ASS REASON, the government called this information their Family Jewels. Oh shit. We’re the worst. No sweat dude. Imagine America’s a body. Got it? Sick. This shit we did’ll be the balls. IT’S A DEAL.
I bet you think that I’m going to tell you that someone fucking killed him for it. Maybe. Probably not. I don’t, look, I don’t fucking know why he died, and guess what, it was in the 90’s when he was an old ass man. YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT WAS SHADY AS FUCK THOUGH.
This weird stern bird of a man, according to like, the law and shit, died in a boating accident in New England where he lived and did a bunch of quiet old boring non-spy (probably) shit. Something about a heart attack or something. But like, there’s all this weirdness. Just before he died, for this story, which like, if you gotta read the whole thing, just click the fucking picture, but like, for this version of the story to work, he would have had to have completely broken a routine he was very set in, and then, according to people who found him, he would have had to have defied the laws of physics. He was found somewhere people already looked, washed up on shore in a place that was almost impossible for him to be, and with his body in a state of decomposition that was completely incorrect for the amount of time he was missing. To some, it seemed like he had been alive for a significant part of the time he was missing.
I don’t know, man. There’s more, but like oh shit! If this shit was a murder who the fuck killed him A, and B, why the FUCK would they try and make it look like an accident? What was this secretary bird of a man up to? Mafia shit? Still just plain ol’ spy shit? Demon hunter? Traitor? Talking shit down at the bar? GUESS WHAT? IT’S A MYSTERY.
I’LL KISS YOUR LIPS IF YOU CLICK THE PICTURE. I’LL KISS YOUR GODDAMN LIPS YOU FUCKING SCREW-HEADED PEACH CLUBBER. GET OUT OF MY FACE. CLICK. CLICK. CLICK.